Seeking Answers

Humming machinery
A television
Sounds of the night
Interrupting the silence
The night would hold
As I sit in this place
And wonder about how
It will all unfold
I hate the insecurity
The anxiety
The fear
It eats away slowly
At my insides
I bargain with God
But feel he has long
Given up on me
And my demands
What is it I’m meant to do?
What’s the purpose
Of all this chaos?
Will I be okay?
How do I get through?
Funny, the only thing
I’m not thinking about
Tonight, is you

What Happened?

What happened to the lover of life,
The go-getter, the joy-maker?
What happened to finding wonder
In the smallest, most trivial things?
What happened to the Goddess,
The confident, independent woman?
What happened to que sera,
Whatever will be, detachment?
What happened to me?