Duality

I don’t want to let today go
It’s been so great
I’ve not let the cracks show
And I can’t wait
Until this becomes my normal
When the smile’s real
And the laugh’s less a chortle
More the real deal
Happiness is there though
Buried down deep
Trying to expand and grow
From dormant sleep
But anxiety comes up
To claim the day
Like a young untrained pup
Who wants to play
Exuberant and daft
But unaware
Of damage it imparts
Without a care

Settle

I knew I’d lost my happy,
But didn’t realise
Just how low I’d become.
For the first time in weeks
I smiled today – really smiled –
And remembered life is fun.
I remembered who I am,
What I’m all about,
Why I always used to run.
But the gypsy blood is dormant,
I no longer crave escape,
Perhaps,
My roaming days are done?
Instead I want to settle,
For at least a little while,
To stabilise, consolidate,
And heal the damaged one.

Giant Leap

I came to the edge
And jumped
I can no longer
Not be me
Now that my heart’s
Been dumped
It’s time to set
Myself free
My true self
That is
The one so
Free spirited
The one that is
Not his
Free from the
Norms inherited
I wonder what
It will be like
To be at once
Completely me
And not have to
Sit and fight
The inner self so
Desperate to be free

Recipe For A Smile

INGREDIENTS
Yo Yo Ma
Johann Sebastian Bach
One unfinished manuscript
Two amazing individuals,
(Constantly texting during the day)
Two laptops
One mobile phone
One mentally ill brain

METHOD
Combine all ingredients while working on the manuscript.