Words From The Edge

Sitting here, longing for complete obliteration, I am aware of the pain that would leave behind. Don’t ever think it never crosses my mind, but instead of motivating me to step back from the edge, it adds to, and compounds, the pain slicing my soul to pieces. Knowing the anger, hatred, and disappointment my thoughts and actions will inspire within you, increases my sense of patheticism and sends my self-disgust skyward. To someone already feeling pain beyond any scalable level, reinforcement of their unlovability makes surrender to lifelessness so much more attractive.

Ache

The beauty of the day is not lost
Even though tears are pouring out
Physical evidence of the cost
Of a mind that’s been fucked about
Craving more than withdrawal
Aching longingly for extinction
The torture of being abnormal
Leaves invisible marks of distinction

Ethereal

There is an ethereal beauty about her
So plain, and yet magnetically attractive
She holds some sort of healing remedy
That others can’t resist dipping into
Thanklessly, and without gratitude
To fulfil their personal needs and desires
Yet she continues to give graciously
Holding onto the hope that one day
She will not just be admired and desired
But honoured, respected, protected and loved

Illusion

The difference is I never
Intentionally deceived
Or influenced whether
Or not you perceived
Me in a way I wanted

You deliberately lied
And created a perception
Of you that belied
The complex deception
Of being something you aren’t

I could have lived with it really
If you’d confessed the truth
When I discovered the duality
But you continued to prove
You could not be trusted

Pieces of truth have emerged
Over time, and many versions
Of reality have blended and blurred
Into convoluted dispersions
Of whatever might be real

So the pain you felt yesterday
I assume is fake at best
Because we both know we play
With different toys in a quest
To divorce from each other

But I will never know for sure
Until we sit together and bare
Ourselves and our souls and pour
The truth out and openly share
How to proceed from here

Blind

I get so caught up
In my own grief and pain
And focus so much
On trying to stay sane
I forget your arsehole act
Is not really you
But a defence to counteract
And protect what is true
So forgive me please
For thinking the worst
And failing to see
Your heart’s also burst
And shattered into pieces

Walk With Me

Fill me with your passion
With your longing and desire
Live out your fantasies with me
Take me to heights never dreamed
Experiences never imagined
Walk with me to the dark side
And release your inhibitions
Together our souls can heal
And rejoice in the discovery
Of the magic we create