Busted

I can’t guarantee I won’t run
If things ever seem more than fun
I ask for patience, that is all
And not to judge me when I fall
I want to give all I’ve got
Just not sure if it’s worth a shot
If I don’t know exactly where you stand
On things I know we hadn’t planned
There I’ve said it for all to see
Another part of crazy me
Few can handle such a messy head
But I’m hoping the signs are not misread
I’d really like to see where this goes
But you’ll have to keep me on my toes
I’m hoping all’s not done and dusted
Just because my mind is busted

Smooth Sailing

I woke up yesterday
Knowing there would be change
I woke again today
Feeling completely strange
Fears quelled and heart happy
As though I’ve emerged
From a dark cocoon
Leaving dangers submerged
And sailing into calmer waters

Words From The Edge

Sitting here, longing for complete obliteration, I am aware of the pain that would leave behind. Don’t ever think it never crosses my mind, but instead of motivating me to step back from the edge, it adds to, and compounds, the pain slicing my soul to pieces. Knowing the anger, hatred, and disappointment my thoughts and actions will inspire within you, increases my sense of patheticism and sends my self-disgust skyward. To someone already feeling pain beyond any scalable level, reinforcement of their unlovability makes surrender to lifelessness so much more attractive.