Altered State

Psychedelic swirls of confusion
Surround everything today
Too many possibilities
Too many questions
Not enough answers
There is also a disconnect
Awareness from
Outside the body
And time does not seem linear

Wish You Were Here

I wish you were here so we could talk
So I could hear your voice
And ask your advice
I miss you so much sometimes
And wish life had been different
To the hellish mess it has been
I no longer care about the hows or whys
Of what happened
It is what it is
But fuck I wish you were here
To help clean up this mess you made
Because I get so lost and lonely


There’s a concrete wall
About halfway up my chest
Below it sits all
The words that don’t want to rest
They’re backing right up
Causing a major blockage
From “I want a pup”
To “my body is wreckage”
Words stagnate behind
That reinforced concrete wall


When I am in your arms,
I want to stay there forever!
When I haven’t seen you for a while,
With no reply to my texting endeavours,
I want to push you away and leave.
But when the push comes from you,
I am completely lost, and
Unsure what to do.


I get so damn frustrated
By this rollercoaster ride
First it’s up, then it’s down
Next I’m on my side
And then comes loop the loop
When the world goes upside down
The doubts kick in, anxiety rises
And I start feeling like a clown
I know this is just a game
And with others that is fine
But for some strange reason
You aren’t the same
And trigger this mind of mine
As always, after the loop
I return a little to my senses
Although I know it won’t be long
Before I’m building new defences
It appears there is nothing
I can do but wait and see
And just keep on loving you
And hope that you love me


What is there besides the heart and head?
Because it seems there is a third party
Desperately trying to cause some trouble.
If the heart is happy, and the head as well,
Why is there a constant self-sabotage
Of the very conditions of that happiness?