Busted

I can’t guarantee I won’t run
If things ever seem more than fun
I ask for patience, that is all
And not to judge me when I fall
I want to give all I’ve got
Just not sure if it’s worth a shot
If I don’t know exactly where you stand
On things I know we hadn’t planned
There I’ve said it for all to see
Another part of crazy me
Few can handle such a messy head
But I’m hoping the signs are not misread
I’d really like to see where this goes
But you’ll have to keep me on my toes
I’m hoping all’s not done and dusted
Just because my mind is busted

Ache

The beauty of the day is not lost
Even though tears are pouring out
Physical evidence of the cost
Of a mind that’s been fucked about
Craving more than withdrawal
Aching longingly for extinction
The torture of being abnormal
Leaves invisible marks of distinction

Topics

I’m nervous about tomorrow
I’m not sure where to start
I have no answers to provide
About the base on which to build
So is it worth saying anything else?
Because without a solid foundation
Everything will crumble, so why bother?
There’s been a change in Muse
But we’ve never discussed that
And I don’t want to look to deeply
Into something that may not last
So I’d probably rather wait
But what will we talk about?

Legacy Strikes Again

The Legacy will never free it’s hold
Depths of pain continue to unfold
Doubt and insecurity rule
Always saying I am a fool
Yet within there’s so much love
Praying for help from above
I just don’t think I’m going to make it
Don’t have the energy to even fake it
It’s days like this oblivion’s calling
And all because I felt myself falling
How stupid I was to even consider
You’d be the one to finally deliver
The freedom I desperately crave
But emptiness is crashing like a wave
And I’m thinking I’ve seen better days
Starting to list all of the ways
To escape this fucked up spiral
Of never-ending love denial
And find peace at last

Secret

I feel the need to tell you this
And yet don’t want you to know
At least not while it’s bliss
But earlier tonight the tears did flow
As I thought how long and hard
I have wished and desired to die
During the near and distant past
And how lucky I am to have survived
So I can be here to experience this