In Training

Maybe you broke me
Made me fully compliant
Achieved what no one else has
But this hasn’t destroyed me
It’s prepared me for what comes next
What an amazing training ground
Our rollercoaster ride has been
I will be forever grateful

Happy and Joyous

How do I capture something
So beautiful and wondrous
As the experience of joy
And happiness?

Why is it so much easier
To write about pain and grief
Or emotional turmoil
Or even relief?

But happy and wondrous
Seem to pass without mention
I wonder if it’s because there’s no
Need to relieve tension?

Take today for example
When the sky was such a
Deep and flawless blue which was
Echoed by the sea

It seems the words just
Don’t do justice to the
Incandescent beauty of the scene
So why bother?

But then a friend reminded me
How the happy and joyous
Pass us by without the
Slightest of mentions

So here is my pledge
For all the world to see
That at least once a month
The words will be joyous and happy

Lonely or Peaceful

Wrapped tightly in my loneliness,
I remember the words of a friend,
“Is it loneliness or peacefulness?”
Giving me motivation to pretend,
To fake it ’til I make it and feel
Peaceful, both without and within,
Until the feeling becomes real.

Illusion

The difference is I never
Intentionally deceived
Or influenced whether
Or not you perceived
Me in a way I wanted

You deliberately lied
And created a perception
Of you that belied
The complex deception
Of being something you aren’t

I could have lived with it really
If you’d confessed the truth
When I discovered the duality
But you continued to prove
You could not be trusted

Pieces of truth have emerged
Over time, and many versions
Of reality have blended and blurred
Into convoluted dispersions
Of whatever might be real

So the pain you felt yesterday
I assume is fake at best
Because we both know we play
With different toys in a quest
To divorce from each other

But I will never know for sure
Until we sit together and bare
Ourselves and our souls and pour
The truth out and openly share
How to proceed from here